And one day soon, my darling, I will pass on. Your father will go on to marry some horrible woman, but fear not. Such hardship will give you the ability to talk to animals, be incredibly good at cleaning, and lead you to marry an incredibly rich, handsome man.
In the hard times, when you wish to remember me, just pull out my fabulous hat, and my heart will be there with you.
If Disney Mothers Lived…
- Marlin would have been less over-protective, and Nemo would have dozens of siblings and a full home. Also, Nemo would have been safe.
- Ariel’s mother would have calmed King Triton down, and convinced him to let Ariel have legs for a few days so she could date this nice young human.
- Belle’s mother would have convinced Maurice going into the enchanted forest was a particularly bad idea, and could have found ways to manipulate Gaston out of her daughter’s life.
- Jasmine’s mother would have kept the palace organized, keeping the Sultan from relying on Jafar.
- Aladdin’s mother would have helped Aladdin get a job, and have a classier bachelor pad.
- Snow White and Cinderella would have had functional, warm homes. And have more than animals for friends.
- Children would be less traumatized when watching Bambi.
Mothers are not perfect. However…
Mothers are safety. Mothers are home. Mothers are the backbone of a functional schedule and transportation system. Mothers are fun and warm. Mothers are the key to learning to walk, to clothe ourselves, to function as a reasonable and likable human being.
They are human beings doing their best to help the next generation of people. However, without mothers, conflict and strife easily abounds. While these leads to better story telling and adventure, it also leads to darker paths and trickier challenges.
In other words, without mothers, we may be better able to find a handsome prince on the other side of a dark forest, but it would be a fairly miserable trek.
I would rather find a reasonably handsome bookkeeper or grocery clerk and grow up in a functional, loving home with a mother.*
And, of course, a Shout Out to my own mother, who lied to my two older sisters and I many times during our first trip to Disneyland as a family. These lies include:
- We were just going to visit friends. (Told as we were piled into the car. Revealed to be a lie as we pulled into the Disneyland parking lot.)
- Big Thunder Mountain has two rides: One that is fast, and one that is the speed of it coming into the loading area. (Revealed to be a lie as we sped down the first hill, terrified.)
- After the initial trauma of Big Thunder Mountain, Mom told us there were no falls on Pirates of the Carribean. (Spoiler Alert: There are several falls. One of them is fairly big.)
It is these lies and other ridiculous tales that have led me to who I am today… which I think is pretty good.
To my own mother, and all the other mom’s out there, whether biological, adopted, or acquired through the road of life…
Happy Mother’s Day
To give you a broader perspective on my mother, here’s a video I put together a couple years ago for Mom. (This includes some of the “Other Children”, those who are not actually my siblings, but may as well be):
And here’s a warm video on motherhood:
What else would change if Disney Mothers lived? What makes moms great? What are you doing to celebrate the moms in your life?